Clem finally gets his football letter sweater

His Mom said Clem did not play organized sports in High School because they didn't realize he could not see until he was almost twelve. Of course by that time all the future Olympic athletes had been in training for eleven years and it was just too tough to catch up. So Clem decided to take a different route (surprise) and he joined the RIFLE TEAM. Duh!! Who wouldn't want to legitimately own and shoot weapons as a young boy in Alabama where everyone gets their first 22 rifle on their tenth birthday? Anyway it was always a joke around our house because he has this crazy letter sweater emblazoned with a Rifle Team crest. (I know this sounds alot like a slow dull trip down memory lane but there is a crescendo.)

After surgery the Doctor informed us that he had removed a massive tumor. Following a brief review of the arduous medical procedure he completed his report with a review of Clem's excellent prognosis. While Faffy and I attempted to absorb this unbelievable report the Doctor very quickly asked us if we had any questions and we of course said NO. What more was there to know...Clem was going to be okay. However, we have since learned that everyone wants to know all the ghorry details of other people's misfortunes and Clem was called upon this morning to find out just what "massive" means in relationship to livers, tumors, and surgeons.

Five of us set to make a list of questions for Clem to ask the Doctor this morning because he kept forgetting all of his questions in his drug induced state. We weren't sure that we could make a meaningful description out of the anticipated gram weight so we prepared a check list that would compare his tumor size to certain size sports balls. Of course everyone has heard of someone who has had either a grapefuit or a baseball size tumor so we thought it would make transferring the information more ammenable to the general population. Stephanie informed us that the liver weighs 3
pounds so our list started at golf ball and ended at football just because we got carried away.

And the winner was.....FOOTBALL!!!! Not just an ordinary football which weighs 14 to 15 ounces but a 7 pound football! Can you believe that? Did he look like a man who had a 7 pound foreign object stuffed into a space where it could not possibily fit? At any rate after we all rolled our tongues back in our mouths and chatted up what a great medical story this was going to make we decided that it was time to present him with the much sought after and much deserved famous football team crest for his High School Letter Sweater.

Clem, Clem he's our man if he can't do it nobody can!!

(Do I have too much time on my hands or what?)